Words matter:Encourage Today

Words

Words matter.. 

They are containers of power, 

Kegs waiting to explode

with delight

or dread.

We can build up

or destroy

Speak life

or death,

Bring joy

or pain

Hope 

or hell.

Reputation made

or destroyed

at a stroke,

careless slip

of pen

or twixt

tongue

and lip,

Pause

and send

Ruin

or mend..

Words matter.
©JoyLenton2013

Negative language breeds negative thinking, insecurity and low self-esteem.

Many of us will grow up believing that there is a marker, a measure of sorts that is considered right or normal and we fall short of it. Those standards could be specific to our family, community or universally applicable. 

"Nobody realises that some people expend tremendous energy trying to be normal" ~ Albert Camus

No matter how we acquire these standards, they can lead to judgemental attitudes (toward others as well as ourselves) and a desire to achieve no less than the perceived idea of Acceptable or Normal at least. 

There is such pressure to fit in and be like other people. How can we help one another to become all we can be?

In seeking to promote healthy self-esteem in ourselves and in others, one of the best ways is to speak positive, encouraging, life-affirming words instead of the negative.

Words have tremendous power to lift, heal, restore and refresh a life.

"Gracious speech is like clover honey - good taste to the soul, quick energy to the body" ~ Proverbs 16:24 

To encourage others literally means to pour courage in, inspire with spirit and hope, build up, spur on, promote, cherish and sustain them by words and deeds.

There is a reciprocal trust involved in encouragement

We have to trust that we have the individual's best interests at heart and the wisdom to say or do the appropriate thing. Their part is to trust us to be genuine and respectful of where they are at emotionally, relationally and spiritually.

Our hearts need to be wise, tender and gentle.

Sensitivity is required to know what to say and when to say it. Encouragement doesn't mean falseness or flattery. It can include constructive criticism if it enables and equips rather than tearing down or destroying.

"Rash language cuts and maims, but there is healing in the words of the wise" ~ Proverbs 12:18 

I have benefited hugely from the positive reinforcement of encouragement from others when a word in due season meant the difference between giving up or pressing on - particularly with any new enterprise, such as this blog was only a few months ago!

Sometimes we are good at offering encouragement yet fail to receive it as we should. Our upbringing may have ill-prepared us to believe good things that are said about us. Mine certainly made the receiving of compliments hard to accept and faults and failings easy to believe. We may carry a burden of worry, anxiety, or low self-esteem that weighs our hearts down.

"Worry weighs us down, a cheerful word picks us up" ~ Proverbs 12:25

One man who is on a mission to spread the word about the power of positive reinforcement through encouraging words and deeds is James Prescott. For, as he says:


"Only when each of us take the risk of opening ourselves to encouragement, can we allow the power of encouragement to be accepted" ~ James Prescott in '5 Steps To Encouragement - A Manifesto for Changing the World'

Although we all have to recognise our limitations. Like many, I am unable to carry out much physical activity due to health problems, but I can always do this:

• Send a message - tweet, Facebook post, text
• Write an e-mail, card, letter, note
• Speak a loving and encouraging word
• Pray for others as needs arise
• Hold them and their situations before God in my heart

Whatever is in our power to do to bless and feed another's soul, that we can do.

"Your encouragement becomes grace that is strengthening, enabling and empowering for others. This is the ministry God will call you to today" ~ Joni Eareckson Tada 'Daily Devotionals'

Let's not delay. No time like the present.

As James says:

"Keep looking for opportunities. Keep stepping out and encouraging people. Make encouragement a habit...We must have our eyes open to the needs of those around us"

We can start by reading this excellent Free resource he has written. 

You can get your copy of the '5 Steps to Encouragement' Manifesto and extra free gifts by clicking here 

Then we can try putting the suggestions into practice

We can start right where we are.

Won't you join us?

I'd love to hear how you are implementing encouragement in your own life and how being on the receiving end of encouragement has blessed you

Do share your own thoughts and suggestions here.

In this post I am linking up with Missional Women Faith-filled Friday
 
You can also connect with me on Facebook or follow on Twitter

Labels

Hi,
Today's focus is on labels.
Now, just in case you think you may have inadvertently stumbled onto a sartorially savvy fashionista site by mistake - and are hastily checking your clothing/bags/items in general for their worthiness or otherwise - let me hasten to reassure you it's not those sort of labels I have in mind.

Though society is, indeed, always trying to pigeon-hole us in terms of what we wear, or by our appearance, actions, words and deeds. It can become very wearying trying to figure out just what we might be representing by such things.

Perhaps it's easier by far to opt out and try not to reveal our tastes, interests or desires?

After all, who wants to be held up to potential public scrutiny or ridicule?

When I joined Twitter I hesitated for a bit over my 'profile'. How do you sum up the essence of yourself in a few choice words? An impossible task, or so it seemed.

Unlike the labels pictured above, our 'labels' do not give 100% information about who we are

Believe it or not, it was especially difficult to admit to being an M.E sufferer - mainly because I have tried for many years not to let the fact that I have M.E define who I am. It was already a creeping, invasive leach on my energy and strength - a sapper of stamina and stealer of all career hopes and dreams. 

Why should I allow it to steal my identity as well? But now, I am glad I was persuaded to add it to the picture because it has opened a door for expressing the side of me as someone who has Chronic Illness and is living and thriving despite and (more bizarrely perhaps) because of it.

Twenty years of life cannot be ignored or swept away - sharing is more profitable than hiding

In having M.E I am well placed to describe its affects, discuss its limitations, sympathise and empathise with other sufferers - and 'trace the rainbow through the rain' in terms of coping with it. This perspective is, sadly, far from unique. 

But, although there are certain shared cardinal symptoms, each person's journey is different and the experience of living with and dealing with it will be their own.

In my poetry and in this blog I am endeavouring to share myself - warts and all - with the aim to connect, enlighten,  inform and hopefully reveal the unexpected fruit of creativity that being virtually housebound has unleashed in me -  and which I now unleash on you, 'Dear Reader' (or 'Accidental Tourist' here perhaps - and very welcome all the same!) Oops, I'm at it too. Labelling you already - sorry.

If I was being pigeon-holed and put into a box by others then I would want it to be like this picture

Don't we all deserve to be handled in this manner?

That is not to say we consider ourselves too delicate, weak or fragile to be given due consideration or respect. Being spoken to or treated condescendingly is never a good thing. It's the 'handle with care' aspect that is applicable to us all in terms of being non-judgemental and accepting of one another.

Yet so many of us have been given labels we neither want nor deserve or we pin them on ourselves to explain to others what we feel we are or what we have done

Looking back at my own 'profile' a few months down the line I wonder if it still fits me? Well, I am still a wife, mother, ME sufferer, avid reader (energy and time allowing), poet, blogger, communicator and full-time follower of Jesus. All present and correct - even if the boundaries between the various roles and interests are blurred at times.

Yet the full essence of who I am is not caught in a few words, any more than is true for you

Some days various facets of my life and personality demand priority.

In an effort to respect this (and avoid the label of 'predictable') I am spreading out my interests.

So you may see my tweets or click to read this blog and find just the poet in residence.

Another time it will be the communicator, deep thinker and reflector.

A person keen to share her spiritual journey.

Then again you may find the M.E sufferer touching base with you.

Perhaps the encourager or exhorter will appear.

Or the woman with a sense of fun and humour

It may be a mixture of them all on any given day.

Whatever it may be, I am still being true to myself and will be encouraging you to keep it real too.

Hopefully I will have got you thinking. There will be more on this topic to come.

Perhaps you are fighting to get rid of a 'label' - self-imposed or otherwise - or really want to gain a new one?

Please feel free to share your thoughts here